Sweet 16: Julia

Today my sweet oldest niece turns 16. I. Can't. Believe. It.

Julia was born right at the start of my senior year of high school. I was 17 years old. I remember feeling relatively indifferent about her impending birth-- I was a typical teenager, caught up in my own world, focusing on my summer job as a camp counselor, excited about the beginning of my last year of high school, and I couldn't really see past myself and my social calendar.

The first memory I have of her really came in the rush of craziness surrounding labor and birth-- something that I now see as miraculous, but then I just thought it was, well, gross. My sister's water broke at our home one night, and we all piled into the car to go to the hospital. Lyle and I stayed with  my parents at the hospital all night-- exploring the hospital, scoping out vending machines for snacks, trying to sleep uncomfortably on waiting room chairs and just waiting for something interesting to happen. Julia emerged into the world early the following morning and I was unprepared. I was thoroughly unprepared for my reaction to seeing that tiny baby for the first time.

I was in love. Immediately. She was perfect, and beautiful, and I loved her.

Courtney took a year off from school at UF to stay home with us and get started in this new phase of motherhood and our lives were changed irrevocably. "We" had a baby. I had no experience with newborns. In hindsight I see so many ways I could have been more helpful to Court during those months-- but I was 17 and not particularly helpful. But, I remember afternoons after cheerleading practice spent rocking the tiny sleeping bundle. And I remember the pride I felt at introducing my beautiful niece to my friends. I remember sitting on the floor in front of her swing and listening to her first belly laugh. I developed a love of buying baby girl clothes and watching her grow and change and learn.

That following year Lyle and I moved into an apartment together and my sister and Julia moved to Gainesville also for Courtney to get back to school. That year was a blur of babysitting, early morning drop-offs to daycare when Courtney had early classes and the overwhelming sense of getting to play a role in Julia's upbringing. I let her drink Coke as a 1 year old (just sips, not full glasses), and in general didn't follow any normal rules with her. Much to Courtney's chagrin.  I cried when she screamed my name down the hall at her daycare when she didn't want me to leave. I loved that she loved me. I bought way too  many baby clothes, took her with me shopping and out to eat, and she became so much a part of me.

And I got to watch Courtney become an incredible mom. She way surpassed me in grades--- even with a 1 year old. She was focused, driven, dedicated to that sweet girl. And she made a life for them, not totally alone, we all helped in our own ways, but Courtney did so much of it herself and proved herself more than capable of being a young single mom.

When Julia was in kindergarten we all moved in together. My bedroom door was covered in drawings she made me. I loved that year. We had a beautiful apartment and I am so thankful that I have those memories of that year-- of Julia as an incredibly beautiful and exceptionally smart 5 year old. Thankful that, for those months at least, I got to see her everyday.

The next years passed, I graduated from UF and moved to Asheville. Courtney and Julia moved to Maryland and I didn't get to see her as much. But, that is the thing about love, about relationships, about family-- you don't have to see each other every day to be an incredibly important part of someone's life. I have loved that girl, and been invested in her life, for 16 years now. I have prayed for her, worried for her, been protective of her, and cherished her.

She is now 16 and beautiful. But more than that she is creative, funny, witty, incredibly smart, uniquely stylish, and confident. She has eclectic tastes in everything from food to movies and clothes.

She has brought me such joy these last 16 years, and taught me so much about the power of love.

And, I am excited. SO excited to see what her future holds. To see where she chooses to go to college, who she picks to date and one day marry (if she wants), what career she pursues-- it is all so exciting.

Julia-- so much to look forward to as you get older. I have been incredibly blessed to be your aunt, but to be more than that too. To be your friend. I will always, always, love and support you. I am so incredibly proud of you.

Happy 16th birthday sweet girl!