Siblings

Today is National Sibling Day...or something like that. Facebook has been full of posts about siblings, you know, "share this if you love your sibling" etc. Which is all fine and good, but come on-- I love my siblings but for a big holiday like National Sibling Day you kind of need to say something a little more meaningful.

As soon as Carver was born I knew that I would have more kids. It was never a question with me. Why? Because I just wanted Carver to have what I had, to know the bond that only comes from your relationship with a brother or sister-- or both if you are lucky enough.

And that is how I feel-- lucky, just extremely lucky and blessed and THANKFUL for Courtney and Lyle.

Courtney and I played fairly well when we were young. I wanted to be just like her. I even chose some of my likes and dislikes based on her opinion of them. I was likely an average little sister-- "borrowed" things without asking and in general drove her insane. I'm not sure that she really liked me as a kid. We had one year together in high school which was a blessing for me-- she helped the transition go much more smoothly. Then she was gone for the next two years  and it was just Lyle and me at home. During that phase our age difference felt like a pretty significant gap.

Then college came and I followed her to UF. I never, never would have survived my first year of college without her. She helped me find my classes, figure out where to pay my tuition, took me to many of my classes, etc. She saved my life. I think that is when we really figured out our relationship. She looked out for me, bailed me out of trouble when I needed it, and we ultimately became friends-- good friends. She is extraordinarily selfless, she gives the BEST gifts, and she is loyal and dependable-- always. She is also hilarious, even if she doesn't think so.

For example: I recently texted her a picture of some ear candles I bought. Courtney is an audiologist with Johns Hopkins and she has a bit of an issue with "ear candles."
                     Her response:
"If those don't work try leeches. Or a witch doctor. Maybe a time machine to go back to the Dark Ages."

See? So dang funny.

Now we are adults and some of the best times of my life over the last few years were visits spent with her and Jules in Baltimore. She is my favorite travel partner too. So many memories that I am thankful for...London, Hawaii, Vegas, Colorado, etc. I hope hope hope for more trips to come.

Getting to have babies only two months apart has also changed our relationship some. Given us one more thing in common. I SO wish we lived in the same city. Maybe one day.

Lyle and I were always close, though to varying degrees. As children we fought like crazy. But I have a lot of memories of playing cars with Lyle and him playing "house" or "school" with me. There is comfort in having a twin. We were usually at the same schools and had the same group of friends. There is also competitveness-- and try as I might I could never quite catch him academically. It still frustrates me. (I couldn't catch Court either). Our senior year we were basically inseparable. We each had cars but chose to ride to school together every day. I even, begrudgingly, joined the tennis team because he wanted me to. Then after high school we moved in together in Gainesville for our first year of college. We fought some, but overall I loved that year. Just the two of us, being on our own. I eventually dragged him to Crestridge with me so we were able to share a love of that place also.

Lyle is SO funny. He is just witty. He can be sarcastic in the best way possible and he tells the best stories. I miss him. We don't get to see each other as often as I would like-- life just gets in the way sometimes. I think a piece of my heart is missing because there is a little bit of a void in my life. I wish we were neighbors, raising our kids together. He'll always be my best friend.

I'd be remiss in talking about siblings if I didn't mention CJ. We visited his grave last week when I was in Bartow. It is amazing how long-lasting grief can be for a brother you never met. Lyle and I are so close, but there is always, in the back of my head, that thought that we started as 3, not two. So many "what ifs"? So much curiosity over what he would have been like and how he would have changed the dynamic of our family. One day I'll get to meet him face to face. The promise of heaven is a comfort here.

And I'm SUPER blessed by a fabulous brother-in-law and sister-in-law. I'm thankful for Michael and Holly and for the addition they are to our family. I am thankful that they love Courtney and Lyle and I am lucky to call both of them friend.

Courtney and Lyle are two of the most important people in my world. I hope they know that.