Dear Carver,
On this day, seven years ago, I was enormous and miserable. ENORMOUS and MISERABLE. Just a few short hours later my water broke and I was at the hospital and you arrived nine days early and things were never the same. Life was instantly so much harder...and infinitely better. The days and months and years are just flying by and I've started having crazy ideas about homeschooling you and your brother because I hate sending you off to school every single day. But, I know that's crazy and I am fairly certain that homeschooling would not be best for you.
And you are thriving at school. You very rarely complain about going to school, you talk about your teachers and you have favorite friends. You come home most days with some sort of story to share about your day--and this is new, every other year I have really not known anything about your days at school because you never wanted to share. I am so glad you tell me things now :)
You are still so creative. You love to draw and color and paint. I have stacks and stacks of papers of pictures you have drawn. And you want to keep everything. Every sketch, every cut piece of paper, everything you have created is important to you. I love this and it causes me a lot of anxiety. I have visions of you as some crazy hoarder one day and somehow it will be blamed on me letting you keep all of your papers. (Confession: I sometimes throw things away when you sleep. But I keep A LOT of stuff too).
You are very generous-- you make pictures for me and Daddy. And you make things for Grandmama and Granddaddy and all of your cousins. You take drawings to your teachers and your classmates and the neighbors. You often do a very good job of thinking of other people, and showing them small kindnesses. You have a good heart Carver, and a very sweet spirit.
Socially I think you have grown a lot this last year. You have a few really good friends and in small groups you absolutely shine. You often take charge with your friends, planning the games you will play, explaining the rules, etc. But with larger groups you are a little more hesitant and clearly less comfortable--and I am the same way so I completely understand.
You and I are actually quite a lot alike. I love to look at you and see so much of my family in you. You tend to favor "my side"-- and so many people think you look just like your Uncle Lyle. You are also moody and often your moods are just unpredictable. You are easily frustrated and you tend to give up easily too-- and I'm sorry, but those qualities probably come from me too.
You also love me better than anyone else on earth. Your heart is vast and you tell me a dozen times a day that you love me. You see me at my absolute worst, and you forgive quickly and easily and without any reservation. You are such an encouragement to me. You love it when we do things just the two of us, and you ask me daily if it is "mommy time." You are so sweet to me and such an encouragement. Even when I am tired or stressed or just feeling weak, you encourage me. And I think it is because of you-- of your faith in me-- that I try, over and over again, to be better. For you and for Carson.
This year, when I was thinking about what word I wanted to pray over you, I kept coming back to bravery. This is also the word that I have been praying over Carson since he turned 4. I want so much to raise the two of you to be brave, not fearless because they are not the same thing-- but I want you to be brave. I want your faith to be so great that you are willing to do hard things. I want you to love Jesus enough to be bold. Love boldly, serve boldly, witness boldly. Be brave.
I am so proud of you Carver. This year has been very transitional for you -- you gained a lot of independence after attending camp and watching you mature this last year has been so interesting. It is fun to watch you grow and learn and become more and more of your own person; and its a little sad too. But I am fiercely proud of you. I think every single person you meet, every single friend you make, will be so very lucky to have you in their life. I know I am so exceedingly grateful that God gave you to us. I love experiencing this life with you, from the small to the big moments and everything in between.
Carver you are smart, and funny, sensitive, and creative, and kind, and thoughtful, and encouraging, and strong, and unique, and brave. I pray for you endlessly and I love you more than you could possibly imagine.
Happy 7th birthday!
Love,
Mama
