August Beach Trip

In August my family took a trip to Anna Maria Island to celebrate Julia's 16th birthday. It was such a sweet time of loving on Julia, spending time together as a family, and enjoying a full week at the beach. It had been a really long time since my family (my parents and the rest of us) took a trip to the beach, though we did it every year when I was growing up. I loved that week.

Because it was still in the crazy busy time of the summer, Daniel was not able to go with us-- Lyle and his family couldn't make it either so their absence kept it from being a perfect family trip, but otherwise I would not have changed a single thing.

We ate at some amazing restaurants, spent most mornings at the beach and afternoons in the pool. We gave Julia daily birthday surprises leading up to her "big" party on one of our last nights there. We took naps and got some sun, and Carson and I made daily early morning Starbucks runs. We made pizzas one, ate Publix subs for lunch almost daily, and had a feast of crab legs the night before we left.

I'm was so sad when the week ended and I am so ready to head back down.

To get beach ready, Jules and I headed to get a spray-tan at a local spa. It was definitely and interesting experience.

The first night in we headed to a favorite of mine-- the Gulf Drive Cafe.

After carrying Carson across the street, Carver informed me that he wanted to be "carried like Carson."

Jules was a good sport for all of the photo taking of her with the babies :)

Jules with all the babies.

Jules and Riley

For our first full day at the beach we had beach and pool time, then made pizzas for dinner. (Sidenote: We LOVE the Tortuga Inn. We stayed there with friends two years ago and I was so excited to go back!)

Later that week we headed to St. Armand's Circle for lunch at the Columbia Restaurant. This was one of my favorite meals of the week...

And then had more pool time...

Another favorite was The Waterfront Restaurant and this salad...

The island has a free trolley that we rode one day. I wish we had done it more than once because it was super convenient and fun. We took it to the other end of the island to go in the tiny museum. Of course, anything historical is on my list of things to do and this was a fun outing.

We spent quite a lot of time on the beach, thanks to my dad who bought a canopy tent for us and put it up my himself every single day. The man is a saint.

Dad liked to avoid the sun and sand and Cargy liked a comfy place to nap. Win win situation.

Mom found these cute chairs for the babies to sit in on the beach and we had a crazy time trying to get a cute picture of all three littles-- but I think they looked SO adorable in these chairs.

Yes, we got matching bathing suits for these two.

The babies got to spend some time "playing" together too. Love it when the littlest cousins get together.

One night we ate at the Beach House Restaurant, which has a great location right on the sand-- a good opportunity for more pictures :)

Heading out to dinner.

At the beginning of the week we had a quick birthday party for Riley who turned 1 at the end of July.

The big celebration for Julia came of Friday night, two days before we all headed home. We went out to dinner at the Blue Marlin Grill (loved it!), then came back to cake and presents.

AMAZING smoked fish appetizer.

On one of our last mornings we headed out to the Rod and Reel Pier for breakfast-- it was a highlight of the week for me. It was a beautiful day, and random, tiny, but good breakfast place, lots of pictures, and even a dolphin sighting.

On our last night we bought 6 lbs of steamed crab legs from Publix and had a casual dinner at our apartment. Another of my favorite nights at the beach.

I am so thankful for the memories of these week. I am so thankful for getting to spend so much time with Courtney and her girls, and SO thankful for my parents for planning this vacation. They are so good to us and our kids and sacrificial with their time and money. I am so thankful for this trip, so thankful for my parents and my sister (and my brother of course) so thankful for our close relationships that are sometimes hard and sometimes messy but such a blessing to me.

 I hope Julia loved it as much as I did and felt very, very blessed during her birthday week.

Raising Warriors

Two weeks ago I attended a conference with my MOPS (mothers of preschoolers) group. I had been dreading this weekend away for at least 8 months. I didn't want to go. I didn't want to leave my boys. I didn't even want to think about it. I knew I would go, but I also clearly believed that I would be irritated that I had to go.

I was so very wrong. That weekend, I hope, has changed my life.

I have written here before about my struggles with fear. My struggle with worry and anxiety. These struggles that I have dealt with my entire life but have found renewed strength now that I am mother. I am completely crippled by the thought of something happening to one of my boys. Crippled. It is a fear that never fully leaves me. I worry that they will get hurt, that one of them will die, that I will not be enough for them, that I will not be able to protect them-- that in this role of mother and protector I will ultimately be found lacking.

So I pray. And I plead. And I cry out to God to just protect my children. Let me die first. But, let me live long enough to raise them. Just keep them safe. Please God.

Then I went to this conference and I heard some amazing speakers. Amazing women. Beth Moore, Lysa TerKeurst, and Jen Hatmaker. And I was completely and utterly broken. Ruined. But,  in a good way.

If you are not familiar with Jen Hatmaker I can't encourage you enough to follow her blog or buy her books. If you get a chance to hear her speak you should go. Seriously.

While listening to her speak I covered my paper in notes. I wrote in the margins. I underlined things. And I felt convicted with every single stroke of my pen.

The very first note I made was her statement that parenting to avoid any situation of struggle or loss equals a life of constant worry and fear. I am so there. It is our nature to want to protect our children from any hardship. Don't we all, deep down, want our children to be safe, happy, and content. Don't we want them to lead easy lives? Sure. But, well, that just isn't realistic.

We have to teach our kids to be brave. This shouldn't be such a revelation to me but it was. This world is full of struggles and horrors and dangerous things. We must guide, teach, and lead by example. She noted, with so much wisdom, that our job as parents is to teach them how to navigate the real world with grace and humility. We cannot teach what we do not do.

Scared moms raise scared kids. Brave moms raise brave kids.

And I want my boys to be bold. To be courageous. To see a world that is sinful and hurting and to face it with love and compassion and empathy. Being conformed into the image of Christ is not a pretty process. It will hurt and we will struggle and we will wish for an easy path. But if I teach my boys to always stay safe, to never take chances or risks then I am not raising disciples that will leave a mark on the world. I am raising boys that will overlook those on the margins of society. They will live in a sheltered world that turns a blind eye to the hurting around them.

And I do not want that.

I want to be burdened with the conviction that my children need to have a passion for the world. I want them to love others in a way that I so struggle with. I want them to see a need and try to help. I want them to have a calling to make a difference. I want them to be brave in their pursuit of being Christ-like.  I want to model for them the acceptance and love of others. I want them to see me looking outside of myself and my circumstances and loving people. Ministering to others. I want to parent them diligently, but not fearfully. I want to create a culture in our family that is committed to doing what is right, even if it is hard. I want us to be a part of the world, not hiding from the ugliness of our society.

I want to raise proud, brave, strong, courageous warriors. I want them to love others, obey God, and live out loud. I want them to be prepared to actually live in this world that we brought them into. 

I want them to have a heart for Christ. My prayer is that I will cultivate that in my own life so that I can lead them by example. I want to love them enough to give them back to God. I want to have enough faith to let them go and know that if we raise them well enough they will survive in this world. 

I want them to be warriors.

Sidenote: I am also reading The Insanity of God by Nik Ripken. I am pretty convinced that it too will change my life. Probably in ways that are scary and convicting and overwhelming...

Dinosaur Train!

Carver LOVES trains. And he loves dinosaurs. Early in the summer I found out that the Great Smoky Mountain Railroad was doing a Dinosaur Train themed excursion, based on the PBS show Dinosaur Train! Mom and I knew we wanted to take the boys so we booked our tickets and waited for the weekend to arrive.

We left early one morning and drove about 2 hours to Bryson City, NC. The train ride was about 45 minutes long and dropped us off in the middle of nowhere in an area that had been set up with Dinosaur Train themed activities. There were bouncy houses, a fossil dig, huge inflatable dinosaurs, miniature golf, face painting and temporary tattoos. The layover there was about 2 hours, we ate lunch, bought souvenirs and did a few of the activities. It was SO fun!

This trip was definitely a highlight of our summer. After the train ride we headed on over to Asheville to visit Julia at Crestridge. We stayed one night at the Ridgecrest Conference Center, ate out at some fun places and got to love on Julia for a few minutes. It was a great weekend :)

Summer Phone Dump (Part 1)

We had a busy, crazy, stressful, exhausting, frustrating, fun summer. We had playdates, day trips, a fun beach vacation, and many many quiet (sort of quiet) moments at home.

And you know what? It was the little moments that were probably my favorite. The spontaneous picnics outside. The trips to Burger King because Carver loves to play on the playground there. The crafts and projects at the house, the endless hours of playing with trains, reading books, and destroying the house.

Every day brought moments of every emotion under the sun. Pleasure in simple things, frustration at behavior issues, exhaustion of single-parenthood, boredom, stress,  and guilt that I wasn't doing "enough." But, we survived. And made a lot of fun memories too.

Oh how I love themed days!

Festive breakfast: homemade waffles, with blueberries, strawberries and a little dusting of powdered sugar.

Lunch: peanut butter star sandwiches, strawberries, goldfish, yogurt covered raisins, and blue star marshmallows.

A healthy snack.

We did the obligatory holiday baking.

And painted fireworks! This was much more successful than our attempt at flag painting....

He didn't get it...

We love play dates! Several times we went to Laurel Park in Gainesville so the boys could play in the splash park there. This time Eli and his Mama joined us!

 We had a little visitor. Picture this: sitting on my couch holding Carson, see something out of the corner of my eye, I look out the window and see a BEAR walking across my yard...

We played outside as much as possible but the RAIN was relentless this summer. We bolted outside every time we saw a ray a sunshine to play with our ghetto plastic pool and the hose. The boys loved it! Occasionally we ate picnic style-- this was Carson's favorite activity, eating.

I found a box of ready made projects and crafts at Wal-mart for about $10. Hours of entertainment.

Oddly enough, the Burger King in town has a great play area. We head over for dinner occasionally when I am alone and need OUT OF THE HOUSE with my two crazies. Side note: they have a pretty decent salad there with chicken, cranberries, apples and blue cheese (or minus the blue cheese if you are me and think it tastes like vomit).

Carver joined me for a 2 hour hair appointment. He sat quietly playing on the iPad for the entire appointment. I didn't know whether to be proud of him or ashamed of myself for letting him play with the iPad that long.

Gem mining with Julia! This is a perfect activity for kids. Digging in the dirt, playing in water, finding "treasures"-- he loved it.

We are blessed with the most incredible sunsets here. A visual reminder, every single night, of the glory of the Lord. It feeds my soul.

More water play time.

 The Dillard House. When asked if Carver wanted me to pick him up to see the horses he said, "No, I just want to see the poop." Boys, they are like a foreign species.

Carver got to go with Mom, Jules and me to Kani House for Hibachi. It was hilarious. He was very...focused.

A little outing to the Mall of Georgia. We rode the carousel, played on the playground, and I squeezed into a tiny train with Carver when he decided he couldn't ride by himself.

And we played in the rain-- a lot. It was a wet summer but what is more fun than umbrellas and mud puddles and spontaneous dancing in the rain?

Stay tuned for more summer fun, coming soon :)

P.S. I'd be remiss if I didn't point out that my sweet Mama was along for most of this. With Daniel out of the house all summer she is what sustains me and the boys. Having her and Daniel's parents around to help lighten the load saves my sanity. I am so very very thankful for my Mom. She keeps me relatively calm, runs interference and calls me on it when I am being impatient with the boys. And she sees the "realness" of my day to day so she gets me and my life right now.